Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Beauty



"Mother-love is not inevitable. The good mother is a great artist ever creating beauty out of chaos" -Alica Randall

This quote was on my Starbuck's cup a few days ago. I like the part where it says "creating beauty out of chaos" because, well, let's face it, my life is chaos about 95% of the time. Can I create something beautiful out of this chaos? Yes I can. I think the problem is that I compare myself so much with what other mom's are doing that my "created beauty" is measured, and judged and then I decide that it's just not as "beautiful" as everyone else's. And then I feel like I'm failing as a mother. We just got done reading "Little House on the Prairie" out loud. I love that book so much. What gets me is the isolation. They only had themselves out there on the prairie at first. They did all the work, they figured out how to entertain themselves and how to build a life without google, or a grocery store, or a friends opinion on every topic that enters into their minds. Not to say that is ALL great ALL the time but I wonder, am I just to stimulated. Am I looking everywhere else for ideas, and opinions, and creativity, and answers, that I have become unable almost to create these things for myself? I want to unplug in some way and create my own "beauty out of chaos" and be satisfied with what that looks like on it's own. How do I do that?

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

oh, good thinking there....perhaps by just realizing this, you're half the way there. and like all the other changes you're making so successfully, maybe starting slow and small, you can start adding some of this to your life. unplugging a day or two a week. set time aside to think quietly. whatever works for you. but don't forget that you have friends out here who would miss you terribly if you totally unplugged. :)

Amy said...

Oh man, you just summarized my whole last year much more succinctly than I ever could. I guess all I can say is it is different for each of us; this authenticty, and knowing you need it is a huge part of it.
p.s. though i know its an inside job, your mothering looks totally lovely from here.

Anonymous said...

I love that quote, it really resonates. Seeing the good, staying positive, all of it. As for the rest, I have no idea. Let me know when you find out!! ;)

Heidi R. said...

BUT if you were out there on the prairie, you would not have gotten such a great quote on your starbucks cup....! lol... I hear ya though. I think about how when we were kids, there was no internet and no cell phone. I seriously can not figure out how i EVER lived without my cell...weird. :)

Anonymous said...

I'm there most of the time - looking for inspiration but feeling too distracted to act upon it. I've "unplugged" before - the last time right before Christmas for a few weeks. It was good and not good. Sometimes I feel as if I've made so many connections but perhaps they are not deep enough to really sustain us?

I'm definitely working on the "balance" thing still.

~Tara

Anonymous said...

It's a balance, huh. I get a lot out of being inspired, but I also get a lot out of silence. Wow you sat & read that whole book. Well you inspire me, so we get down on ourselves too much of course. :)

Anonymous said...

Silence is great, Meditation is wonderful. An hour a day is reasonable and do-able for everyone. It gives extra time that you never knew you could have. You CAN find the time and it feels so good. Just a suggestion--
Luv, :O)