Monday, April 28, 2008

Five

DSC03794
Jack,
Today at exactly 11:59am you turn five. I keep looking at you, trying to take in everything. Your smooth skin and long legs. Your big brown eyes and long eyelashes. Your freckles and your smile. I feel like I'm trying to capture you, to hold you somehow and stop time, so I never forget you as you are right now in this moment.
5 years ago right now you were about 3 hrs from being born. I was in the most intense pain of my life. I was at the very end of a long exhausting labor. I think of that pain now and see only the beauty in it. I think the pain left an imprint that filled in later with memories of all the beauty in your birth. I see the sweat and tears and devotion and love and work it took to bring you to us. I remember that final push and seeing you and holding you for the very first time. I hope you will always know that that feeling and moment will always be with me.
DSC08809
Today you are a fun, emotional, caring little guy. You are passionate and smart and intense. You are loving an imaginative. Sometimes when I look at you now it's like that first time, with amazement and wonder. I see magic in you Jack. I see God in you. I see you like that first moment five years ago, pure beauty and love and I am amazed.
DSC02368

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

i like your post....he's gorgeous and i know what you mean by being amazed when you look at those long legs! geez where did the time go?

happy birthday to Jack

Anonymous said...

happy birthday jack!!! i love this post and i always love that ice cream picture. So awesome. I can't believe he is 5 already....so crazy!! cant wait to see u guys on saturday!!!

luv, Heidi

marz said...

woah if Coach Keck seperates the 3's & 4's from the 5's & 6's... N will be left in the dust! ha ha. wow, amazing isn't it? How we can hold the newborn them in our heart even tho they just keep growing? amazing. And Jack is a very cool boy.

sara said...

In my six-month pregnant state, this made me cry! Although it probably would have even if I weren't six months pregnant. Happy Birthday Jack!

Renee said...

Happy Birthday to your Jack. He is beautiful in every way.

Anonymous said...

Truly a glorious, magical day and unforgetable moment it was when precious Jack was born. Holding my special grand-son for the very first time is a feeling I will always treasure. I was blessed to be present the day Jack came into this world & hope to be present to celebrate Jacks birthday for many years. Happy 5th Birthday Jack. I love you, G-ma Sue

Helen said...

Happy Birthday Jack!! All the best to a very sweet wonderful boy.
WONDERFUL pics.

Anonymous said...

Maya says "Felice CumpleaƱos, Jack"

Amy said...

OK, I'm crying now.

Unknown said...

I wept like a baby. Then I emailed my mom who wrote poems about keeping me in a shoe box so I wouldn't grow up. This post sent me into some space in between being a father wanting to cherish these boys while their young and a little boy who now is beginning to understand those poems by his mom...

Jason

Mindy said...

because of your support before, you are invited to join the new wishstudio! come be inspired at wishstudio blogzine dot blogspot dot com

Sivan said...

Awwww how sweet! Happy birthday Jack! And mommy and daddy too of course :)

LBA said...

Happy Birthday to both of you :)

What a lovely post .. although i'm afraid my latest birth is still too fresh to see any beauty in it .... :)

Anonymous said...

I bawled my eyes out with this one. Written just beautifully!

jenica said...

you've got me crying. ;-D happy birthday jack. happy birth-day mama.

everything you write reminds me of my own thoughts. thanks for sharing them. ;-D