Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Rocky has been getting up early these days. Very early. I'm wiped out today. Yesterday I was still flowing with the early early schedule, even breaking out the muffin pans before sunrise and making us all some blueberry muffins. Today though, whew. Three kids huh? not sure what we were thinking with that. Today I don't know how to handle taking care of them, their needs, the house, the constant messes being created. I don't know how I'm supposed to fit in time to take care of myself. Spiritually, mentally, physically. Is it OK to sit down while the hurricane swirls around me and just try to find a calm mental space to slip into? It feels like a luxury, like I should keep moving. A giant robot mama who's sweeping arms continually move to swoop up clutter, and stir noodles, and hold hands and play Lego's all at the same time. So anyway I sat. and I wrote. and I held little hands, did laundry, made breakfast, lunch, and dinner, cleaned bathrooms AND so much more. I took time for myself AND played AND did my housework BUT man I am beat. Something has got to give. Maybe tomorrow it will be the laundry, or the kids room, or the dishes. I just can do it all and that has to be OK somehow.