Monday, May 12, 2008
I love my mom. I love my daughter. When Stella was smaller and I was still nursing her I would imagine that I was my mom nursing me as a baby. Does that make sense. It was a very powerful image in my mind at times. And then there were other times when I would look down at my nursing daughter and imagine that this baby was myself as a baby and I was feeding and loving and caring for myself newly born. Writing this down sounds weird. Anyway, I want to know how to hold onto her innocence. I want to protect her from from harm, from others and also from herself. I know the greatest harm done to me has been by my own hand and thoughts. Will she be the same? different? Are we all like that? How can I help her be strong and think clearly and lovingly. To embrace herself lovingly as well as others. I'm sure it starts with me, I know it does. I'm still learning though, will that be good enough for her? Alright I could ramble on but I'm taking a computer break today and that needs to start about now, the natives are getting restless.