Monday, February 12, 2007

Alone

We are all feeling a little blue today. We dropped John off at the BART station to go catch an airplane to Kentucky for the next week. I can't believe he is going to be gone for a whole week. As I drove away crying after dropping him off I felt completely overwhelmed with the thought of not having him here for so long to talk with and cuddle with, and with not having his help with the kids.
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Before I made it home though I came to the realization that all I really had to do was deal with today, could I make it through today? Right then and there I didn't allow myself to think about the whole week, and it helped.
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So far today has been good, I've decided to try to potty train Stella while John is gone to surprise him when he gets back. We've only had one accident. Yipeee!!
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I can't tell you how tomorrow will go, or even tonight. I really dread doing the whole dinner/bedtime routine with the kids without him, it is usually a little chaotic, but I know we'll get through it alright, and tomorrow will come and we will do it all over again, who knows maybe the week will fly by. The last time he was out of town for a week we went back to Sacramento and stayed with some friends. It was exhausting for me though, so I thought I'd stick around home this time and see how it goes. Wish me luck.

10 comments:

yuan8888 said...
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denzylle said...

I'm in London, and have been reading for about a year, altho' I've never commented.

I enjoy your writing, and your children are beautiful.

I don't practise any (organised) religion, but I believe in a God, and I like the spirituality you express thru' your writings on your daily life.

I'm sure you'll do just fine, one day at a time, and that John will be home before you know.

kristen said...

Good luck girlfriend. Here's to hoping that you 4 get into a nice groove. Taking it day by day is a good approach. And I love these photos of Jack.

The Whole Self said...

good luck mama! you're going to be amazing.

those pictures of your boy are so breathtaking. i love his intensity!

Irene said...

yes, deal with just today and it will be fine. I know how daunting it can be, but be gentle with yourself, never skip a meal and nap with your kids, I promise you'll do great. xoxo

Marilyn said...

You've got the right idea...just focus on TODAY. And if it helps, you can break it down even smaller...just try to get through the next HOUR. And don't forget to BREATHE. Even if you're crying (especially if you're crying!)...crying requires even MORE breathing! ;) Hugs.

Wendy said...

Come see MEEEEEE!

Or I can come see you. We are out of town Fri-Mon but maybe this Thursday we could meet up and let the kids run wild.

la vie en rose said...

one day at a time--good plan!

vickie pellouchoud said...

Heather good luck, I've only had to deal with 3 days at a time, can't imagine a whole week. If you can, let the baths go to every other day at least, try to let up a little and go with the flow. Oh lordie, can't imagine 3 on my own, just know I'd need some big time support from friends during that time.

Hang in!

Riss said...

I'm sorry you alone. I didn't know...I wish I could come see you this week. We are busy every day through next Wednesday. But I am sending you loving thoughts and lots of patience and energy *vibes* right now. Luv you.